I don’t know who created this, but among the thousand words it is worth: Hello? Is it me you’re looking for? I can see it in your eyes. I can see it in your smile.

And I can see in the smile and the eyes of this blind girl who sculpts Sir Richie’s head out of Play-Doh. So funny.

What a dumb ass. Hee haw.

And here we witness the difference between a talented, loving barista and a careless wreck. Or perhaps hungover, blind in one eye, and mourning a lost contact in the other. Still, Alterra serves some of the most delicious coffee in the world.

Look at this bunny—so serene, so content. Inches away from him is a seven-foot ostrich, its sharp claws ready to pounce.

The rabbit is relaxed, knowing the world cannot conform to his desires. The ostrich never touches him.

Also, ostrich have no teeth and tend to feed on grass and shrubs.

I was staring at this Alaskan beauty for all of 11 minutes when a mass of ice broke away, plunging into the frigid waters—a practice known as glacial calving. You can see the splash of water in its suicidal wake.

My mind went to global warming, but glaciers are a complicated beast. Calving is the result of many variables, including tidal fluctuations, storm surges and overzealous sea lions.

I’m slightly incredibly afraid of becoming Old. One day—poof!— your living room becomes a communal arrangement of ratty chairs and jigsaw puzzles. This one’s a Betty Crocker (recipe card included).

Still, there’s the organ to look forward to.

This poor pony lost a contact at the Polo Classic on Governors Island. He spent one chukka (seven minutes) searching for it, to no avail.

And with it went his A-game. Prince Harry was not pleased.

In 1970, the US Postal Service chose for its logo the bald eagle.

His furrowed brow and austere ways later influenced the creation of curmudgeonly Muppets Statler and Waldorf.

USPS, San Francisco, CA

Most neon signs encourage beer drinking.

I suppose hanging this in a bar would do the same, but in a kindlier fashion. Chin up.

Here we witness “improper” use of quotation marks.

(Unless, of course, the words refer to a mechanical hound like the ones in Fahrenheit 451.)